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Losing Hope

Hello All, I just posted here a couple of days ago. My story line was Need a Miracle Just #1.

Well sad to say I just got back my results from the fertility nurse, she said that I did not ovulate again with the clomid 100mg. She informed me that I will have to try for the 3rd time clomid again but this time it will be 150mg. When I recieved her message today I was so nervous to find out if I had ovulated. I closed my eyes and prayed for that instant that the nurse would say I did ovulate but, I closed my eyes and heard what I did not want to hear which was that I did not ovulate. You can imagine how I felt.

I just hung up the phone and tears were falling out from my eyes without even blinking, just imagining that I failed once more. I have prayed so many times day and night and night and day for about 4yrs. I ask myself why has god not heard my prayers? What did I do to deserve this? I just feel that I have no strength to believe anymore and I feel that my life is not complete if I can't become a mother.

What I am feeling right now is so unexplainable. I feel anger, sadness, stress, and feel like crying till I can't cry anymore.I feel like screaming and hitting myself for being useless. I sometimes feel I need to drink to forget about all the pain I am going through. What I am feeling I don't wish this feeling to anyone.

My husband has been by my side everytime. He supports me 100% He says I promise you that you will get pregnant you'll see. He is very positive that I will become pregnant. He has always had a positive mind. He told me today, "Don't worry baby will keep trying again and again and if that does not work will try anything else even if that means I have to work extra to pay the medication" He has always said to me that he loves me for who I am and that if we can't have children he will still love me forever but, I know deep down inside that when he sees children, the look in his eyes is full of happiness hoping that he had one. I wish there was something to make me stop hurting inside.

I just can't imagine my life without kids. My husband is the most wonderful man I have ever met and he deserves for me to give him a child. It's so hard for me to keep a smile for my family because I don't want them to now how much becoming a mother has affected me. I have to hide my depression and anger from them and act like I'm okay with this.

If there is someone with a similar story like mine, please let me know what your story is like. that way I know that I'm not alone. I will post again after I have taken my 3rd 150mg clomid. If there is anyone with hope left, please I'm begging you to pray for me because I don't seem to have any hope left in me.....

Gabby

I just want to be a mom...

Please know that my prayers are with all the women who are having trouble having a child. You are not alone.. there are so many of us out there.

My story is this... I'm 32 years old and I've been with my bf for 4 years. He has an 11 year old who i love dearly, but I would love to have a child of our own. We got pregnant last year, but it was a bad egg and I miscarried. It was heart breaking. I knew something was wrong with me but my doctor insisted I was fine.

After changing doctors, I was diagnosed with PCOS. Finally!!... someone knew something was wrong. I am currently on Clomid and will get my first injection tomorrow. I am keeping my fingers crossed and praying that by some miracle we get pregnant.

I just want to be a mom.

Priya

Need a Miracle Just #1

I want to wish everyone luck who posted on here... May god bless us all with at least one child of our own. So we can all experience the wonderful miracle of becoming a mother for at least just one time.

I am 24yrs old soon to be 25. My husband is 26 going on 27. We have been going to a fertility doctor. His sperm count came back normal. I found out I was the problem. The doctor said I was not ovulating. He started me off with 50mg Clomid on days 5-9 cycle. last month 1/2008. I got my blood work done and it came back that I had not ovulated. The next thing I know I got my period. You can imagine how that felt.

I was depressed and crying. My husband by my side was comforting me saying it's okay we can try again. I managed to get over that depressed emotion and I am now on round 2 of clomid but now it was doubled to 100mg. I just went today to the doctor to get my blood work done. I am hoping and praying that I did ovulate this time. I will be getting my results within days. I am so nervous to find out if it worked or not. I really don't want to feel the negative responses again.

I feel I cannot deal with any more pain and sadness anymore. I look at myself in the mirror and say to myself I am useless as a woman because I cannot give my wonderful husband a family.

Please pray for me that I will pray for you. I will let you know my results..... God Bless You All!

Gabby

dear Lisa

Dear Lisa,
I feel for you, & I will keep praying for you that you are successful.

If you can't conceive, would you consider adopting a child out of the system? So many unfortunate children need homes, I;'ve already become a foster parent I;m just waiting for the paper work.

I pray that the good LORD will bless you & your hubby one way or another. May the LORD bless you & keep you in your time of sorrow.

Elizabeth

Keep Praying Mindi

I know exactly how you feel. I will soon be 40 years old this July & my husband & I have been trying for 8 years. My husband has had a visectomy reversal but it didn't work. I have done 3 IUI with donor sperm, all unsuccessful.

My husaband said that I could do it once more & that was it! I am praying that it works this time. I know how hard & sad it is. I cried an awful lot. But I know that our good LORD has a reason for making us wait.

Just keep on praying & don't forget that JESUS loves you & that's why he died on the cross for you.
The LORD has kept me from doing anything stupid. I will pray for you as well as everyone.
But you & I are very similar situations.

Elizabeth