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Pannick Attacks

Hi...my name is Melissa and i have a beautiful baby girl of 6 months old...i love her with all mty heart but right now im suffering because of my ansiety and pannick attacks...every day i feel im going to die...i´feel weird when i go to a mall or when im alone in my house....sometimes i can´t aleep at all...im always worry about my heart palpitations and i feel i can´t breath...i feel sad and feel i don´t worth...but whern i see my baby i prayed to God for help me be stronger...i cry because i wish i could be normal again...my partum was by cesary and my scar still hurt when its cold....i hope i don´t feel scared of dying every day...my husband thinks im crazy....but its hard to control the way i feel...please give some advice because i don´t want to take any antidepresants....im scared of trying them. I already went to a psiqiatrist and he told me to take lexotan...but i din´t. im just to scared of this drugs cause a don´t want to have a fall...

Melissa

Night & Day

I have been pregnant twice. I have labored twice. I have ended up with a cesarean twice. I have had two completely different recoveries.

After my first child I experienced no hint of baby blues, I was on cloud 9, and was back to doing light housework within weeks. I even started training for my first marathon before my son was 3 months old.

After my second child I expected a similar experience. To say that didn't happen would be an understatement. Instead I suffered from a "borderline postpartum depression" despite being more satisfied with my birthing experience the second time around. I also began to experience a myriad of medical problems the doctors couldn't understand, explain, or even begin to treat. My symptoms ranged from lochia that continued for 6+ months, to bouts of what felt like food poisoning but wasn't, to pain that debilitated me for minutes at a time. I went through test after test and no one could find any answers. Eventually my husband & I made the tough decision to stop breastfeeding. In direct correlation with my weaning, my symptoms began disappearing & within one month all of my symptoms had disappeared. Still, no one can tell me why.

I don't know if I'll be having any more children. After my second child, I felt certain that I wouldn't, but lately I've been reconsidering. The reality is, every pregnancy is different. I won't know what another will be like unless I live it.

Melissa

Baby Blues

Hello, my name is Beka and i'm 21. When my husband and i found out i was pregnant we were scared at first but soon grew to love the idea of starting our family. i had a perfect pregnancy and loved every minute of it but couldn't wait for my baby boy to be born. Finally i went into labor. i was a week early and gave birth to our son on valentines day after a long night of hard labor. it was so amazing to see him for the first time but i couldn't understand why i felt so sad. this was the moment i had been waiting for so long! i chalked it up to being tired and my hormones being out of whack. i was at the hospital for 3 days and the nurses really pushed keeping my baby with me pretty much the whole time. especially since i was nursing. i loved having him with me but got no sleep as a result. i slept only 3 hours during my whole hospital stay when i should have been recuperating. when we were finally able to take our baby home i was excited, but scared. that first week was hell. my husband was really sick and we didn't want our son to catch it so he couldn't help at all. i was still not getting much sleep because even when my son was sleeping i was afraid that if i fell asleep he might stop breathing or i wouldn't wake up from his cries. i was a mess. i cried constantly and wished i had never gotten pregnant in the first place! which of course made me feel guilty and brought on more tears. i felt depressed, lonely, guilty, and sleep deprived constantly. i didn't know what to do. i didn't have any thought of hurting my baby but knew i couldn't go on this way. well as it turned out my son did end up catching the sickness from his father when he was just 1 week old. he was admitted to a children's hospital for RSV and we stayed there 5 days. that week was even worse! finally when my son was about 3-4 weeks old things got better. i started getting sleep, my son was healthy, and my hormones started to go back to normal.
all to say, if you experience the baby blues, know that it WILL pass. i know it doesn't feel like it, but it will. my son is now 5 months old, extremely healthy at 20 pounds!, and he's the light of my life. i wouldn't trade him for the world. and i am so happy that i DID get pregnant and god granted me my little angel.

beka

My wonderful littlle girl

I decided to read and write here, pbecause it can help someone in my case. I have a beautiful litlle girl, she is 15 months. A year ago i had post partum depression, it affected me and my family,. I was deseperate all day , i had panic and I wasnt enjoying my life at all. I didn`t want to take care of my two babies, and didnt want to be with them by myself. Now i am taking medication, i received theraphy for six months, i like bwing with them, i feel better, but my advice is to look for help, this is normal but some pepple will never talk about it. Sometimes i am scared it can comeback, but i try to be positive and look forward. I love my family .

Marycarmen de Cabrera

PPP

Help. I don’t know what to do. I've been suffering from Post partum psychosis and I’m too ashamed to tell anyone that I know. What makes matters worse is that the one person that I did find myself confident enough to tell now has threatened to take away my baby and commit me to a mental health facility. I can’t stand the fact that my little one will be taken away much less the fact that I’d be put in a hospital until I get over this illness. Isn't there anything else that I can do?

Laura