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My Lost Love

Hi my name is Candice and I was just 13 when I became pregnant. My life didnt exactly start right but when i got pregnant I knew it was time for a change. i didnt tell my mom i was pregnant, she found out on her own. by this time i was 14 and 3 months pregnant. i was the happiest i have ever been. my family really didnt support my decision of being a single parent but i made my mistakes and i knew i was going to have to step up and take full responsibility. After a couple weeks it was time for another ultrasound. i went to the doctor as usual and did the normal routine... but when they looked and tried to listen for a heartbeat they didnt find one. my baby died inside me... he was a boy... i went to the hospital and they ran all types of test and told me i would have to deliver the baby. on May 9, 2007 my baby came out. i got to name him and all... his name is D'shawn Terrell Neely. i will never forget that day. it took me well over two years to except the fact that God wanted D'shawn in his garden. My body just wasnt ready for a baby and neither was I. Till this day i could never speak upon this subject. It was just to painful. but I love my son and always will...

Candice

Stillbirth at 30 weeks

Hi, We lost our little boy only 10 days ago, By his 27th week appointment everything eas fine, his heartbeat was a bit slower but midwife said its fine, I noticed few days later that his movements slow down and soon after there was no atall, but I tried not to panic because with my daughter she stoped for few days and then again started to kick me, so I thought everything is fine, but then my tummy got very soft and I didnt felt him for 10 days so we went to my GP and he said he cant hear his heartbeat and send me to hospital where they confirmed that his little heart stoped, in that moment I wanted to die, I still want, its so hard to deal with that, with thought I will never hold him again. In hospital in next day they induced me and day after-5 days before christmas-I gave birth to my little angel, he had cord around his neck but its was loose, so they dont think its the cause, doctors where suprised that its happened, because all his scans and my blood tests were perfect, so today I found out that they finished with autopsy and my little boy is coming back, because we are doing funereal for him, been crying since, just hope they will be able to tell us whats went wrong because we want a baby, but we need to know will its happen again, and I keep trying to find answers in internet reading stories and thinking what I could done better, but We can only wait now for resaults and I really hope they will be able to tell us whats happened. I never thought in million years that this could happen with me, I thought once I passed 20 weeks nothing can go wrong...Good We have our 3 year old daughter, she keeps us moving forward, shes a fuuny girl and makes us laugh, but I do feel guilty with every time I do. I still sometimes feel like I want to die but I have lovely girl and partner who needs me, and we will allways love and remember our little baby boy angel...

Kristine

Lost my little baby boy

I am 28 year old and my husband and I tried to conceive for almost a year. When we find out that I was pregnant we were so exited. We really love that baby from the first moment. I went to my appointments at weeks 5, 8, 11, and 14 and everything was perfect. Also my medical record was perfect and neither my husband or I have a history of any kind of genetic problems in our families. When we visit the doctor on week 17 we were expecting to know the sex of our baby. It was a special day and i was almost Christmas. It was the best gift we could ever get. Unfortunately things were wrong and the doctor did not find my baby's heart beats. I was destroyed. The next day we did another ultrasound and it was confirmed. My baby died when he was around 14 weeks. Probably a few days or hours after my appointment on that week. I never imagine that something like that could happen to me. I did not bleed and I only have normal pains that I though were from the growing uterus. That same day I was induced to labor and my baby was born the next day. I still remembered his little eyes. We still don't know the cause of death. We definitely want to try it again but we are so scared. We don't want this to happen again. This was our first baby :( Our little baby boy

Nelly Sola

Stillbirth at 35 weeks

I lost my baby boy at 35 weeks, it was the most devasting emotional pain I've ever experienced iin my entire life. My doctor had scheduled routine stress test twice a week. I was at my third visit and everything was going great up until that point, when the nure told me she couldn't find a heartbeat. My heart sunk to the pit of my stomach, I was in shock, so was my huband. We were both so looking forward to our son's arrival. Afterwards my doctor ran several blood tests and found that I had a blood clotting disorder {Factor V Lieden} that most likely caused the death of our son. It's been almost a year now and it still saddens us greatly, I still cry over the loss of our baby boy, the family was devasted as well. Fortunately there is hope for us, with the right treatment during pregnancy it will most unlikely not happen again. I am 40 years old, and pray everyday that got will grant us another miracle. God bless anyone who has experienced this kind of pain. The greiving process is a long road to travel down, but we are remaining hopeful that we will be able to conceive again when the time is right, pray for us. :-)

Kelly Pittel

over 20 weeks

I was so excited, it was my first pregnancy and everything was going well. I had morning sickness all day every day up until week 16. We had heard the FHB at 9 weeks and 14 weeks, so we went to the 20 week scan all excited (we were 19 and a half weeks at this stage). We didn't want to know if it was a boy or girl, just that everything was ok.
We got there and I started feeling nervous, the lady before me was HUGE compared to me and she was only 1 week ahead of me. We went in and the poor ultrasound lady couldn't find a heartbeat anymore. We were devastated. They estimated the baby to only be about 15 weeks in size.
That was only the start of our problems.
I was shunted from specialists to hospitals to doctors ... No one wanted to help cos the baby was too big, and I was over 20 weeks by this stage.
I ended up in our local hospital. They needed to give me drugs to induce labour, but they couldn't guarantee that it wouldn't happen on Christmas day, so I had to postpone the drugs till Christmas Eve. I ended up in hospital on the 27th Dec having to give birth to my baby. It went very smoothly until my Placenta was retained, and I needed to go into theatre for a DnC.
Being over 20 weeks, there was talk about birth and death certificates, but thankfully because the baby was so small, it was not necessary.
I am just thankful it is finally all over, and we can move on and try again.
My body is an amazing thing, and I know in my heart that it was not meant to be this time. It gives me comfort to have a wonderfully supporting partner who is excited to try again and I know that this was just a test run for the real thing next time!
I know it is easier to say than do sometimes, but it is vital you try and stay positive. Everything happens for a reason, and this has made my relationship so much stronger with my partner. I have had the opportunity to see what a tower of strength and love he can be.

Kat