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I lost my pulguita

I'm 22 years old, and i'm from Ecuador, on January 2010 I should be giving birth to my first child, but i lost it sixth months ago, it was an ectopic pregnant... Even now i'm working, i never stop thinking how would it be, i love my baby, although i never saw it, i've been crying since july, my fiance is sad but i saw in him that he tries to be strong so he could help me... Last night we praid for our baby, we prefer to think he or she is in heaven taking care of us... I want to have another baby, but I'm afraid, I don't know if I could pass all over this again... I carry on my purse the only eco I had from the baby and i kiss it sometimes... I can't look to other woman that are pregnant, and today a partner of work told she was pregnant and that she doesn't know if she want it, I hope she changed her mind... Thank u for reading, and sorry if my english is not very good...

Carolina

I lost my fifth baby

I was so glad to know I was having a boy. I have two older kids from my first husband a boy and a girl. Me and my second husband have two daughters and were waiting for our son we lost. We only knew that he was a boy for one day until we knew he wouldn't survive. I thought that I would die from heartache. That was one of the worst days of my life. I had never lost a baby and didn't know how that felt. After four healthy babies from 20 to 2 years old. Mind you I am 35 even though I know they consider that advanced maternal age. It hurts so bad to loose such an anticipated baby we thought we were done girl or boy. We just wanted a healthy baby....again and then this happened that would change me forever. The mommy me who was supposed to be strong was now weak and broken and for got her purpose. I have lost alot in my life but never thought I would loose a child that was the only thing I was good at. Making babies until now. I still walk around with a broken heart. I don't know how to heal myself and move on.

amber

dealing with losing my infant son to stillbirth

I just lost my son to stillbirth.. it was the most shocking thing i ever thought i would hear. My pregnancy was going great until november 25th of this year i went for my scheduled appoitment with my OB and he put the doppler on my stomach and said i hear a heartbeat but it is very faint and told me to go to the hospital and get ready for a emergency c-section so i am obviously got really worried but realized if there is something wrong we should get the baby out. So by the time i got to the hospital they put the ultasound on and the fetal monitor on me and they told me there is no heartbeat and that my baby had died. i was so shocked i thought i was in a bad nightmare. but yes so now i am grieving and i cant stop thinking about my baby boy Connor.

Susan

holding my head above the water

I'm 26 and just had my second miscarriage. It seems like yesterday that I realized I hadn't got my period yet. My breasts were sore and the smell of coffee made me vomit. I decided to wait a while and when I was three weeks late I took a pregnancy test. It was positive within seconds. I was scared because I had already lost a pregnancy before. But I started taking my prenatals, eating right, and reading books. I went to the doctor and everything was fine. I saw my baby's heartbeat and it was strong. I fell in love with her at that moment. weeks later I started to bleed. Scared I called my doctor. He told me to go to the emergency room. they said I was having a threatened miscarriage. I was put on complete bed rest. I prayed and prayed. Five days later I met up with my doctor. He told me my chances were 50/50 but to watch out for heavy bleeding and cramping. A couple hourse later I went into labor. The pain was unbearable. This went on for ten hours. I dropped my baby in the tub. I was horrified. Screaming and bawling so hard that my body was shaking. My mother had to clean the blood off me because of how hysterical I was. Each moment feels numb. There are no words that comfort me. I am lost, I am broken, I am despaired. The life that once lived inside me is gone and I am left with my arms empty.

Amelia

i have been trying

hi ,i m 23 married.at first i had actopic pregnancy ,after three weeks i found out i was pregnant again this time it was normal,in 6months i had membrane rapture and gave birth to prembaby boy ,who lived for 3months then past away due to lungs problems.after 6months i was pregnant again with blinded oval.since then i get normal period and always make sure that we have sex in 14 days.i get my period after 28 day and they are normal but i dont get pregnant .please help what wrong with me why cant i conceive i m frastrated because of my situation.thank khomo

shirly