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Baby Jaxen Kemp

My baby Jaxen was lost 4 weeks ago today at 33 weeks. I had a normal pregnancy and no complications. On Monday 3/28 I wasnt feeling well and I noticed that his movements had slowed down a little, but he was still moving and I had a fetal monitor at home and could hear his heartbeat. On Wednesday 3/30 I was laying in bed and I could not find his heartbeat that night. I started to freak out, but I decided to wait until the morning. On 3/31 I still could not find it, and I went to the dr. They couldnt find his heartbeat and the ultrasound confirmed that he was no longer alive. The days since that day are all a blur for me now. I sit here and cry and want my baby back. I should be almost 38 weeks. not visiting my baby at a gravesite. This is unfair and I am hurt, I cry, scream, sit in silence, feel numb... I want my baby back.

Jamie

i miss you

when i was 16 i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant, my boyfriend broke up with me 2 days before i found out, i never told him it was his, but he already knew, It was just me and my mum living at home i decided to keep my baby and she was supporting me. we were so happy to find out i was having a girl. we both decided to name her Chloe Jade (we called her CJ for short) i had 5 weeks left and we were all prepared. and one night i started having contractions i was freaking out my mum took me into hospital and 2 hours later i gave birth to a stilborn baby. the grief was unbearable, i didnt go to school for 9 months due to my depression i slept in my mums bed for a year and i felt numb all the time. it has now been 2 years i have graduated high school i have a wonderful boyfriend who i went to primary school with, i miss her everyday and my lifes not the same but i pushing through the pain

paige

my baby percy

i felt great and was so excited i was having a boy , have 2 girls already aged 4 and 7 who i adore. and then came the blow they noticed on my scan i had cysts on the cord , straight away i thought o myself that cant be a good thing im only 20wks. I was then referred to a specialist hospital to have a more in depth scan just to really have what they said confirmed.The consultant said it was very rare and he explained how if the cysts grew then my babys blood flow would be stopped , i felt sick. The plan was to get me to 26 wks and then scan me and deliver if the cysts were affecting the flow as on this scan flow was still ok. Just over a week later on a thurs i noticed i had not felt baby move much, so first thing fri morning took myself upto hospital . I sat and waited just knowing my little boy had gone and had it confirmed after a scan. Its been just over a week since i gave birth to my boy who i named percy and its the worst thing ever ive had to go through. Never knew i could hurt this much.

rebecca

You Showed Me What Love Really Is

I am currently 15 years old, a freshman in High School. I was in Jr. High when I got pregnant, a lot of people in my school, outside of school, and people currently reading this will judge me for being that young. I got pregnant after going out with the guy for a year and a half. We broke up before I had the chance to really tell him, and once he did tell him, I told him I was getting an abortion, he believed it and didn't care. He went on as if nothing was wrong. I never wanted to get an abortion, and even being young that never crossed my mind. I wanted my baby, not because I wanted to "fill some void" or "feel unconditional love" like some people may think, but because once a baby is inside you, its hard to not love that tiny, precious, innocent thing inside of you. Walking around school everyday knowing everyone was talking about me, knowing my life would never be the same, was easy compared to what I was going to experience. I was walking around this past summer being 23 weeks into my pregnancy, and I went into preterm labor. I had to push, knowing that it would mean my son was no longer with me, I had to push and know my son would never walk or smile or cry or recognize me as his mother. I held my son in my arms and cried. Its been 9 months now since it happened and it still hurts everyday. When your child dies it teaches you what love really is. So to my baby son Ryan, you showed me what love really is.
Its hard, but I hope anyone good luck with every story, and every baby story because no matter how many weeks you are, that baby is yours and no one can take that from you. God bless

-Bonnie

Bonnie

in an instant

I was a senior in highschool when i learned that i was pregnant. I had just broken up with my boyfriend, the father, and didnt know what to do. We knew i could be pregnant the day it happened, but he had voiced his opinion on wanting me to get an abortion. Days passed and i finally decided to lie and say i got my period. I think its crazy with all the women that abort their child can decide in an instant that they arent ready to be mothers, because at 17 years old, in that instant upon discovering my pregnancy, i decided i was. I was so excited. i didnt tell anyone because it was, mine. like something so special that i wanted to hold on to as long as possible. I dont remember what day it was when i miscarried. I dont remember what i was wearing or what was playing on my ipod. I remember i was thinking about telling the dad, and then I remember crying, for days. I stopped going to school, i stopped everything. I am currently writing a paper on abortion for my last project in English. and i stumbled across this site of other brave women and their stories. Ill admit im a little biased when it comes to abortion only because i never got the choice. goodluck to everyone out there.

cass